Living with my parents makes me feel like I am being suffocated, very very slowly

milkistermoo

milkistermoo

NEET
Dec 2, 2020
2,707
My parents don't let me do anything. I've wanted to learn stuff over the months and years, and they don't let me. I wanted to take up wood carving and they didn't let me. I wanted to learn to cook and they didn't let me, but I did it anyway by pushing my mom somehow. I wanted to learn how to paint and they didn't let me get anything for it. I can't even go out biking half the time because they don't like where I'll be going or the time I'll be leaving at. I wanted to start gardening semi-properly and they didn't let me, so I just had to make do with the bare minimum.

My parents let me become isolated even in my childhood, they didn't care to notice and if they did they didn't care. In school I had a few chances to do some new things that I was afraid of but I was also excited for because it'd be me taking a step in the right direction and it was like I couldn't do anything without their shadow looming over me or I had to do it in secret which just made me stressed out and anxious.

I used to be fat, they didn't let me lose it. I started losing it and eating less and they would not stop shutting up about how I was getting weak, and they would constantly push me to eat stuff. It made me EXTREMELY stressed out when I found out I'd be going somewhere and refusing to eat something would mean everyone would see the drama. With the weight loss thing, it was almost all my relatives who'd do this stuff tbh. I gained it all back and then lost it in a much healthier way but my body composition is still messed up. My mom told me she would feed me and made me fat because she found it "cute"

I hate living here, I hate having to shut everything in my room, I hate hearing their voices outside, I hate them calling me, I just wish I could move out. The reason I sometimes enter phases of being a night owl is probably because at night is the only time I feel a bit alone.

Does anyone feel this way? What have your experiences been like? I'd love to read them. (Sorry about the rambling, don't have enough mental energy to edit my train of thought)
 
jaded jabble

jaded jabble

NEET
Nov 30, 2020
3,671
My parents don't let me do anything. I've wanted to learn stuff over the months and years, and they don't let me. I wanted to take up wood carving and they didn't let me. I wanted to learn to cook and they didn't let me, but I did it anyway by pushing my mom somehow. I wanted to learn how to paint and they didn't let me get anything for it. I can't even go out biking half the time because they don't like where I'll be going or the time I'll be leaving at. I wanted to start gardening semi-properly and they didn't let me, so I just had to make do with the bare minimum.

My parents let me become isolated even in my childhood, they didn't care to notice and if they did they didn't care. In school I had a few chances to do some new things that I was afraid of but I was also excited for because it'd be me taking a step in the right direction and it was like I couldn't do anything without their shadow looming over me or I had to do it in secret which just made me stressed out and anxious.

I used to be fat, they didn't let me lose it. I started losing it and eating less and they would not stop shutting up about how I was getting weak, and they would constantly push me to eat stuff. It made me EXTREMELY stressed out when I found out I'd be going somewhere and refusing to eat something would mean everyone would see the drama. With the weight loss thing, it was almost all my relatives who'd do this stuff tbh. I gained it all back and then lost it in a much healthier way but my body composition is still messed up. My mom told me she would feed me and made me fat because she found it "cute"

I hate living here, I hate having to shut everything in my room, I hate hearing their voices outside, I hate them calling me, I just wish I could move out. The reason I sometimes enter phases of being a night owl is probably because at night is the only time I feel a bit alone.

Does anyone feel this way? What have your experiences been like? I'd love to read them. (Sorry about the rambling, don't have enough mental energy to edit my train of thought)
My parents did everything they could, im just fucked
 
Raguel

Raguel

NEET
Nov 27, 2020
299
Be smart, learn to use the rules against them. Then they create new restricting rules, but don't let your emotions weaken you, create a brand new plan again, keep going on and on.
It never ends with adultery. People keep fighting against their family until death, normies, chads everyone has this problem
 
meremy jeeks

meremy jeeks

Janny
Nov 29, 2020
179
My parents don't let me do anything. I've wanted to learn stuff over the months and years, and they don't let me. I wanted to take up wood carving and they didn't let me. I wanted to learn to cook and they didn't let me, but I did it anyway by pushing my mom somehow. I wanted to learn how to paint and they didn't let me get anything for it. I can't even go out biking half the time because they don't like where I'll be going or the time I'll be leaving at. I wanted to start gardening semi-properly and they didn't let me, so I just had to make do with the bare minimum.

My parents let me become isolated even in my childhood, they didn't care to notice and if they did they didn't care. In school I had a few chances to do some new things that I was afraid of but I was also excited for because it'd be me taking a step in the right direction and it was like I couldn't do anything without their shadow looming over me or I had to do it in secret which just made me stressed out and anxious.

I used to be fat, they didn't let me lose it. I started losing it and eating less and they would not stop shutting up about how I was getting weak, and they would constantly push me to eat stuff. It made me EXTREMELY stressed out when I found out I'd be going somewhere and refusing to eat something would mean everyone would see the drama. With the weight loss thing, it was almost all my relatives who'd do this stuff tbh. I gained it all back and then lost it in a much healthier way but my body composition is still messed up. My mom told me she would feed me and made me fat because she found it "cute"

I hate living here, I hate having to shut everything in my room, I hate hearing their voices outside, I hate them calling me, I just wish I could move out. The reason I sometimes enter phases of being a night owl is probably because at night is the only time I feel a bit alone.

Does anyone feel this way? What have your experiences been like? I'd love to read them. (Sorry about the rambling, don't have enough mental energy to edit my train of thought)
I hate living with my parents too. Too poor and lazy to move out
 
NEETmax2TheBrimBoyo

NEETmax2TheBrimBoyo

Maximum OverNEET
Dec 9, 2020
110
Lots of familiar things in your post although it's much worse than my youth and current situation. My youth was pretty chill and right now at the age of 31 they're still pretty chill, it's really just a couple of things that kept (and keep) repeating that make me go mad because it accumulates. My family suffers from intrusive thoughts, especially in the area of worrying and generally being overly protective, so a lot of this was projected on me when I was younger and it kinda fucked me up and also made me socially awkward.

As an example, when I entered my first year of high school they managed to talk the principal into letting me have my cell phone on in class, 'in case there was an emergency'. The emergency often being that they'd hear an ambulance outside, had the thought pop up that it could be me and then had the thought become intrusive up to the point where they can't let it go and have to call me to check on me. Another example is when we'd go on a school trip, I wouldn't be allowed to come and they'd call in saying I was sick. When the school started catching on they'd make arrangements so that I could join the school trip, except I'd be transported by my parents by car instead of bicycling to the location from school with all of the other kids (extremely common in my country to cycle everywhere even as a kid). Couldn't join even if I wanted to though because I wasn't exposed to cycling outside because WhAt iF A CaR LoSeS CoNtRoL oF ThE WhEeL. Naturally I was soft-bullied for this by other kids. I say 'soft'-bullied because I don't want to pretend it was similar to people who got bullied much more severely, they just kind of ostracized me or made a remark every now and then. Third example is when we went to Disneyland and I was in the queue for nearly 2 hours to go on a rollercoaster, they randomly waded through the queue and pulled me out even though I was maybe 10 minutes away from getting on the ride, just because they got the thought in their head that the rollercoaster could crash with me in it and it escalated in their minds until they couldn't take it anymore. So yeah, it took me a long time to 'catch up' and I had to tell my family to fuck off many times along the way when trying to control me, especially as I got older (18+).

I don't resent them though. They are genuinely good people, they are just mentally ill. Still living with them now two things are blatantly obvious: 1) they genuinely wish the best for me and have my best interest at heart, and 2) they are undoubtedly mentally ill, some more than others. Just like some incels are born with shitty jawlines & hairlines and therefore are bad at attracting girls, some people are born with mental illness or aberrant personalities which prevent them from optimally raising children. Also, they didn't have the internet, let alone google.

They don't really bother me anymore, but they do fight constantly with each other and generally just scream and shout a lot at nothing. It's not aimed at me but it's still kind of obnoxious having to live in the same house, but at the same time I am being kind of parasitic because I'm not paying for rent, electricity, water etc. so it's the good with the bad. I used to rent an apartment and live alone in the couple of years I worked 40hr/wk and honestly it was a grossly superior living condition, but I was also paying rent, internet, gas, water, electricity, and so forth.
 
Aedra

Aedra

Funeral Attendant
Nov 26, 2020
1,369
My mom told me she would feed me and made me fat because she found it "cute"
Awkward Exit
 
p@rc@
Dec 2, 2020
1,098
My parents don't let me do anything. I've wanted to learn stuff over the months and years, and they don't let me. I wanted to take up wood carving and they didn't let me. I wanted to learn to cook and they didn't let me, but I did it anyway by pushing my mom somehow. I wanted to learn how to paint and they didn't let me get anything for it. I can't even go out biking half the time because they don't like where I'll be going or the time I'll be leaving at. I wanted to start gardening semi-properly and they didn't let me, so I just had to make do with the bare minimum.

My parents let me become isolated even in my childhood, they didn't care to notice and if they did they didn't care. In school I had a few chances to do some new things that I was afraid of but I was also excited for because it'd be me taking a step in the right direction and it was like I couldn't do anything without their shadow looming over me or I had to do it in secret which just made me stressed out and anxious.

I used to be fat, they didn't let me lose it. I started losing it and eating less and they would not stop shutting up about how I was getting weak, and they would constantly push me to eat stuff. It made me EXTREMELY stressed out when I found out I'd be going somewhere and refusing to eat something would mean everyone would see the drama. With the weight loss thing, it was almost all my relatives who'd do this stuff tbh. I gained it all back and then lost it in a much healthier way but my body composition is still messed up. My mom told me she would feed me and made me fat because she found it "cute"

I hate living here, I hate having to shut everything in my room, I hate hearing their voices outside, I hate them calling me, I just wish I could move out. The reason I sometimes enter phases of being a night owl is probably because at night is the only time I feel a bit alone.

Does anyone feel this way? What have your experiences been like? I'd love to read them. (Sorry about the rambling, don't have enough mental energy to edit my train of thought)
Maybe they want someone to care of them when they become old, I've heard some parents purposefully "failo" their children in order to have someone around when they reach old age.
 
milkistermoo

milkistermoo

NEET
Dec 2, 2020
2,707
Lots of familiar things in your post although it's much worse than my youth and current situation. My youth was pretty chill and right now at the age of 31 they're still pretty chill, it's really just a couple of things that kept (and keep) repeating that make me go mad because it accumulates. My family suffers from intrusive thoughts, especially in the area of worrying and generally being overly protective, so a lot of this was projected on me when I was younger and it kinda fucked me up and also made me socially awkward.

As an example, when I entered my first year of high school they managed to talk the principal into letting me have my cell phone on in class, 'in case there was an emergency'. The emergency often being that they'd hear an ambulance outside, had the thought pop up that it could be me and then had the thought become intrusive up to the point where they can't let it go and have to call me to check on me. Another example is when we'd go on a school trip, I wouldn't be allowed to come and they'd call in saying I was sick. When the school started catching on they'd make arrangements so that I could join the school trip, except I'd be transported by my parents by car instead of bicycling to the location from school with all of the other kids (extremely common in my country to cycle everywhere even as a kid). Couldn't join even if I wanted to though because I wasn't exposed to cycling outside because WhAt iF A CaR LoSeS CoNtRoL oF ThE WhEeL. Naturally I was soft-bullied for this by other kids. I say 'soft'-bullied because I don't want to pretend it was similar to people who got bullied much more severely, they just kind of ostracized me or made a remark every now and then. Third example is when we went to Disneyland and I was in the queue for nearly 2 hours to go on a rollercoaster, they randomly waded through the queue and pulled me out even though I was maybe 10 minutes away from getting on the ride, just because they got the thought in their head that the rollercoaster could crash with me in it and it escalated in their minds until they couldn't take it anymore. So yeah, it took me a long time to 'catch up' and I had to tell my family to fuck off many times along the way when trying to control me, especially as I got older (18+).

I don't resent them though. They are genuinely good people, they are just mentally ill. Still living with them now two things are blatantly obvious: 1) they genuinely wish the best for me and have my best interest at heart, and 2) they are undoubtedly mentally ill, some more than others. Just like some incels are born with shitty jawlines & hairlines and therefore are bad at attracting girls, some people are born with mental illness or aberrant personalities which prevent them from optimally raising children. Also, they didn't have the internet, let alone google.

They don't really bother me anymore, but they do fight constantly with each other and generally just scream and shout a lot at nothing. It's not aimed at me but it's still kind of obnoxious having to live in the same house, but at the same time I am being kind of parasitic because I'm not paying for rent, electricity, water etc. so it's the good with the bad. I used to rent an apartment and live alone in the couple of years I worked 40hr/wk and honestly it was a grossly superior living condition, but I was also paying rent, internet, gas, water, electricity, and so forth.
I'm glad you've been able to put all that behind you. Thank you for sharing this with us :)
 
milkistermoo

milkistermoo

NEET
Dec 2, 2020
2,707
Maybe they want someone to care of them when they become old, I've heard some parents purposefully "failo" their children in order to have someone around when they reach old age.
I've heard that too, especially with moms. I doubt it's that here, but who knows what goes in people's subconscious minds.
 
milkistermoo

milkistermoo

NEET
Dec 2, 2020
2,707
If you have your own room you can kind of build your own world. Going from my room to the rest of the house feels like going from south to north korea.
Yes, I realised that very late. I'm actually working on that and other self sufficiency things.

Especially when you live in a fucking tiny flat with thin walls and share a bedroom with ur sibling
I can relate to the thin walls thing. I have a bathroom connected to my room and my room only and I have to go into that to make sure my voice doesn't go out when I'm voice chatting
 
FastBananaCEO

FastBananaCEO

NEEK
Nov 29, 2020
768
I can relate to the thin walls thing. I have a bathroom connected to my room and my room only and I have to go into that to make sure my voice doesn't go out when I'm voice chatting
I literally have zero time to voicschat. It's so fucking annoying..there's so many things I wanna do but can't because of my fucking poor fucking lazy low iq parents deciding to have not 1 but 2 children depsite being only able to afford 2 bedroom flats. And I'm never home alone cuz of my dad who never does any work.
 
milkistermoo

milkistermoo

NEET
Dec 2, 2020
2,707
I literally have zero time to voicschat. It's so fucking annoying..there's so many things I wanna do but can't because of my fucking poor fucking lazy low iq parents deciding to have not 1 but 2 children depsite being only able to afford 2 bedroom flats. And I'm never home alone cuz of my dad who never does any work.
So what's your personal situation like? How old are you and are you planning to work/study so you can eventually find a way out?
 
FastBananaCEO

FastBananaCEO

NEEK
Nov 29, 2020
768
So what's your personal situation like? How old are you and are you planning to work/study so you can eventually find a way out?
Dunno I am never gonna go to (((university))) (unless it's online) and I don't like jobs that require social interaction cuz of my ugly face so I'm thinkin I do my own business/ideas whilst delivery driving where I earn 20k a year and then move out to a lil 1 bedroom flat as soon as possible. (6 years into working hopefully)

I want to just leave as soon as possible. I have low standards of living as long as I have fucking space and room to myself which I don't currently have. Any apartment will do.
 
milkistermoo

milkistermoo

NEET
Dec 2, 2020
2,707
Dunno I am never gonna go to (((university))) (unless it's online) and I don't like jobs that require social interaction cuz of my ugly face so I'm thinkin I do my own business/ideas whilst delivery driving where I earn 20k a year and then move out to a lil 1 bedroom flat as soon as possible. (6 years into working hopefully)

I want to just leave as soon as possible. I have low standards of living as long as I have fucking space and room to myself which I don't currently have. Any apartment will do.
Whatever you do, do it well. I wish you good luck. Hope to hear a good update from you by 2022 :)
 
milkistermoo

milkistermoo

NEET
Dec 2, 2020
2,707
What are Ur plans for the future?
I'm going to move out of my parents' house for the rest of my Uni. (They'll pay for it, it's their fault I can't earn money anyway. They've kept me infantilised). When I do that, I'll be free to properly do the things I want to. Explore the world, go out to new places, improve my cooking, do woodcarving and stuff, become self reliant on everything except finances.

I hope I am able to establish a network of people who I can work with, so I don't have to get a job and slowly have life drained away from me. Far fetched, but the only reason I haven't given up is because that small chance exists.
 
FastBananaCEO

FastBananaCEO

NEEK
Nov 29, 2020
768
I'm going to move out of my parents' house for the rest of my Uni. (They'll pay for it, it's their fault I can't earn money anyway. They've kept me infantilised). When I do that, I'll be free to properly do the things I want to. Explore the world, go out to new places, improve my cooking, do woodcarving and stuff, become self reliant on everything except finances.

I hope I am able to establish a network of people who I can work with, so I don't have to get a job and slowly have life drained away from me. Far fetched, but the only reason I haven't given up is because that small chance exists.
Tbh it would be cool if I knew people from here and .co irl so den we could start a business or somethn.
 
milkistermoo

milkistermoo

NEET
Dec 2, 2020
2,707
Tbh it would be cool if I knew people from here and .co irl so den we could start a business or somethn.
There were actually a couple programming related threads here and I realised how many people who're into that are here. In a few months, we'll all be good enough to able to collaborate. I already discuss programming with Dinoysus. I'm certain we could easily collaborate on a game or something if we wanted to.
We could use programmers, sound guys, video guys, design guys, internet guys, all kinds of guys.
 
FastBananaCEO

FastBananaCEO

NEEK
Nov 29, 2020
768
There were actually a couple programming related threads here and I realised how many people who're into that are here. In a few months, we'll all be good enough to able to collaborate. I already discuss programming with Dinoysus. I'm certain we could easily collaborate on a game or something if we wanted to.
We could use programmers, sound guys, video guys, design guys, internet guys, all kinds of guys.
True dat.
 
Neetgod

Neetgod

Neetcel sourcer
Dec 18, 2020
10,246
My parents don't let me do anything. I've wanted to learn stuff over the months and years, and they don't let me. I wanted to take up wood carving and they didn't let me. I wanted to learn to cook and they didn't let me, but I did it anyway by pushing my mom somehow. I wanted to learn how to paint and they didn't let me get anything for it. I can't even go out biking half the time because they don't like where I'll be going or the time I'll be leaving at. I wanted to start gardening semi-properly and they didn't let me, so I just had to make do with the bare minimum.

My parents let me become isolated even in my childhood, they didn't care to notice and if they did they didn't care. In school I had a few chances to do some new things that I was afraid of but I was also excited for because it'd be me taking a step in the right direction and it was like I couldn't do anything without their shadow looming over me or I had to do it in secret which just made me stressed out and anxious.

I used to be fat, they didn't let me lose it. I started losing it and eating less and they would not stop shutting up about how I was getting weak, and they would constantly push me to eat stuff. It made me EXTREMELY stressed out when I found out I'd be going somewhere and refusing to eat something would mean everyone would see the drama. With the weight loss thing, it was almost all my relatives who'd do this stuff tbh. I gained it all back and then lost it in a much healthier way but my body composition is still messed up. My mom told me she would feed me and made me fat because she found it "cute"

I hate living here, I hate having to shut everything in my room, I hate hearing their voices outside, I hate them calling me, I just wish I could move out. The reason I sometimes enter phases of being a night owl is probably because at night is the only time I feel a bit alone.

Does anyone feel this way? What have your experiences been like? I'd love to read them. (Sorry about the rambling, don't have enough mental energy to edit my train of thought)
I can definitely relate to most of what you said. I became a night owl because I didn't want to see my parents. My parents hold me back even when I show some initiative and fortitude but yet dont support me then later complain that I have no ambition. I hated coming home to my moms visitors sitting in the living room asking me person questions. Also hearing my mom and dad talk shit about me through the thin walls.
 
P

Patient A

Mynamejeff
Nov 30, 2020
306
ideologically opposed to working for someone else's dream (cuckoldry) and I hated the work I was actually doing on top of it, which made my current situation the better option
Fair enough enjoy your sadness living with your parents. I wouldn’t want to go NEET the way you have tbh
 
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